BUSINESS
CAREERS
DELEE
FROMM
Self promotion for some law-
yers can be uncomfortable at best
and downright painful at worst.
If you don’t like to self-promote
you are not alone. And if you are
comfortable, are you doing it the
best way possible? Are you using
your credentials, experience and
unique strengths to maximum
effect? Many lawyers promote
themselves in a way that is more
like a monologue than a duet and
that can create hurdles to achiev-
ing their intent—namely, getting
new business, increasing profes-
sional alliances and being viewed
as accomplished.
Why it’s hard
So why is it that most of us
don’t like to talk about our-
selves and our achievements
with others? Perhaps we were
told by a parent “not to toot our
own horn” when we had done
well and were enthusiastically
telling others about it. Or we
learned the hard way by brag-
ging to other playmates and
were then excluded from group
games and activities. Whatever
the experience, many of us don’t
like to talk about our accom-
plishments, credentials or even
mention our positions. Lawyers
I coach tell me that it seems
distasteful, makes them appear
arrogant or even unprofes-
sional. Some even find it boring.
Some say it evokes the fear of
rejection. As Canadians we may
fear the “tall poppy syn-
drome”—we don’t want to
stand out above the crowd. For
many however it is the belief
that if we just work hard enough
our accomplishments and skills
will get known.
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The first step is
preparation — you
don’t want to wing it.
It is important to
determine your
strengths—start by thinking about your greatest
successes. What do others think is exceptional about
you? What are your best skills, abilities and traits? Also
think about what energizes you — what are you
passionate about? This will give your information energy.
2
The second is
understanding your
audience. Often
lawyers — who are
used to advocacy — believe that putting forward a cogent,
rational presentation about themselves can’t fail to win
over others. However focusing on the message is only one
aspect of persuasion. Research shows that understanding
your audience and what persuades them is as important,
if not more important, than the content of your message.
Self promotion can be
very natural when you
are doing it in a way that
is comfortable for both
you and the person you
are talking to. It revolves
around being authentic
and comfortable with
talking about yourself as
well as engaging the
other person. In today’s
market it is more
important than ever to
make the right first
impression and if you
can enjoy it as well —all
the better.
Delee Fromm is both
a lawyer and psycholo-
gist who coaches and
trains lawyers in leader-
ship skills. Her con-
sulting firm is Fromm
& Goodhand.
3
4
The third step is being able
to talk about yourself in a
conversational
way — being able to
weave in your credentials,
achievements and
successes will make it
sound authentic and
natural. Canned and fast is
not best — instead it is a
great way to leave a less
than favorable impression.
Or worse still, no
impression at all.
The fourth step is allowing them to get curi-
ous about you and engaging them in the con-
versation. It is a duet always and not a mono-
logue. You want to be as curious about them as
you want them
to be about you. Get them
interested in hearing about
you. Get them to ask ques-
tions. New research is show-
ing that when we listen to
others our brain waves and regions of activation synchronize
with the other person’s brain waves—so we really do have a
mind meld. So if you think of self-promotion as less of an infor-
mation dump and more of a mind meld you will be off to a
very good start.
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